Deb Fischer thinks she’s the gal who can best defend Nebraska values in Washington, DC.  She’s not a career politician.  She’ll protect landowners. She won’t raise taxes.  She’s going to find all the terrorists!  Seriously, these are her campaign promises.  They’re so dubious, all we can say is that there’s something fishy about Deb Fischer.

Let’s take her proclamations apart one by one.  First of all, you can’t claim that you’re not a career politician when you’ve served 21 years in elected office as a school board member and as a state senator.  When everyone around the state capitol knows you’re one of the governor’s favorites, you’re a career politician.

Deb Fischer promises to defend all that’s sacred to Nebraska like ranching and farming.  Really? That’s news to us.  That’s news to all your constituents in Holt County who have been bullied by TransCanada, threatened with eminent domain and have heard nothing from you.  If you care SO much about landowners and the Nebraska way of life, why couldn’t you even deign to show up at the Natural Resources Committee hearing on the three pipeline bills?  We know several of your constituents were there, asking for some common sense protections.

“I won’t raise taxes” is such a tired, old conservative line that we’re loathe to even touch it. Congratulations, you fulfilled your constitutionally-mandated duty of passing a balanced state budget.  So did 48 other state senators.  We’re more appalled at your “concrete over kids” bill that earmarked General Funds for road repair.  That means less money for our schools and health care system.  That means increased taxes at a local level to make up for lost revenue.  How nice that Fischer can claim to balance the budget without raising taxes while Nebraska’s kids get short shrift.

Deb Fischer’s going to make sure the government gets back to the job of hunting down terrorists. This one threw us for a loop.  Has the government been remiss about tracking down those nasty Al-Qaida fellows?  Last time we checked, Twitter exploded because everyone was celebrating Obama ordering a Navy SEAL team to take out Osama Bin Laden.  Twenty of the top 30 Al-Qaida leaders in the Middle East have been taken out in the last year and a half.

One thing Fischer didn’t talk about that we find extra fishy is her choice in campaign staff.  We’ve heard that someone in Nebraska has hired the Des Moines firm LS2Group which specializes in political PR.  Our hunch says it’s the Fischer campaign.  If Deb Fischer cares so much about putting Nebraskans to work, why not hire the Nebraska staffers on their own?  Why hire the entire, Iowa-based firm?

All this peculiar rhetoric and strange hiring practices has us in a quandry.  We don’t know if Fischer’s really in this race to win it.  Does she want to be Senator, or is she gunning to take over the Governor’s Mansion after her pal Heineman leaves?  And why doesn’t her campaign have a website up and running?  Is LS2Group hoping that we live in 1995, and the Internet won’t be a factor in Fischer’s run?  If she wants people to come to her campaign announcements in Lincoln, Grand Island, Kearney, Sidney and Scottsbluff, why isn’t that information easily accessible?  All these questions have us feeling that there’s something fishy about the Fischer campaign.

Don’t believe us?  Watch the stump speech for yourself:

Update, 10:35pm, June 28: Fischer’s website is up and running